It’s been 8 years since I ran a marathon. After getting my certification as a personal trainer and nutrition coach, running fell to the side as I focused on weight training and HIIT. I lost a lot of weight, was in the best shape of my life, and helped others achieve their health goals.

Life happened and I went through a couple of rough years, but fitness and coaching others became my lifeline. When moving to a place I had always dreamed up became a possibility, I took it. Thankfully, eventually, things in my life turned around and I was the happiest I had ever been in my life – even when the same stinky things were still there. I share that in my book, The Journey, in case you want to learn how that happened. But, fitness fell to the side as I was living my best life. I was enjoying this newfound peace, joy, and love in my life. I didn’t need fitness to feel better about myself and I didn’t need it as an outlet anymore.

Over the last 5 years I have experienced what it feels like to live in peace, joy, and love – no matter the circumstance. I am living a spiritually and emotionally healthy life. Physically, however, things seemed to get out of control. Suddenly, I noticed a shift in my confidence and the thoughts I had about myself. I struggled to get back into it all, but the negative emotions tied to fitness were a very real thing that I had to face.

I’ll be honest. I’ve been trying to get back into it for about 2 years. On and off, and with a severe shoulder injury, I just keep going. I had my ups and downs. My starts and stops. The word yo-yo comes to mind. Can anyone relate? But, I would eventually have enough and start something to get me going.

I’ve been learning a lot about neuroscience and psychology these last 6 months. It was in June that I made a drastic change with how I was going to live my life. It was no longer going to be about what I do, but who I am. All my goals shifted from what I wanted to do to who I wanted to be. Wow! I’ve sure gotten a lot done since June, even though it wasn’t my focus.

So, here I am, at the end of the year where I finally learned that who I am matters more than what I do. I’ve experienced so much healing in my heart, mind, and soul – and, it’s led me to this place where the things I once loved that were tainted by pain, betrayal, and bitterness, are healed and I can find the joy and pleasure in them again.

Dreams that had died because they were choked by lies and deceit have been resurrected.

Running is not something I do, it’s who I am. I am a runner. It is a gift God gave me. I know not everyone will understand, but that’s okay. I know this to be true. It is fact. It’s reality. So, to close off the year, I made a choice to nurture the dream that was brought back to life.

I’m training for marathon #11. While I’m not sure which one I’ll do, I’m starting all over again and I’m giving myself a year to prepare. Building up to a half this spring and planning to run a full next winter. This is where I will journal my #journeytomarathon11.

This weekend I completed my first 5k race. I may be starting over, but I’m smarter and stronger this time. I’m retraining how to run by focusing on my form and posture. There’s a long way to go until I reach the speed I left off at, but that’s not what this is about. This journey is about dreams becoming reality.

Do you have dreams that died, but you find yourself visiting the grave because you miss it so much? I’m here to tell you that you may think that dream is dead and past its time, but the fact you keep visiting it tells me that there’s still life in that dream. Dig up that grave. You’ll find your dream is alive and kicking.

Together, let’s make our dreams a reality.

xoxo,

AJ